The danger signs of a marriage in trouble

July 23, 2009
Author: Matt

Often times marriages can become rocky.Other times disagreements between couples could be common.  And then there are the times when a marriage can become in danger.It is this time when you might only be able to save it through counseling.

With marriage being a big part of our society, as well as a big part of our personal lives, there should be steps taken to prevent the marriage from going into that danger zone.  So I would like to offer some tips that I have gained through experience as a marriage counselor San Diego.

So what are the signs of danger of a troubled marriage? Well they can be many things.  It could be money problems, children or teens, even sexual or intimacy issues, or it can be job related.As you see, there are a lot of areas that can strain the relationship.  But nipping those issues in the bud is what can save a marriage.  Allowing it to continue could lead to horrible consequences. 

So it is at those times, you should seek some marriage counseling San Diego.A counseling session can provide a safe environment to talk and address the issues.  It is during these times that a breakthrough could happen and issues can be resolved.

Also the couples are provided a safe and common ground so they can start a productive dialogue.  Often times dealing with those issues at home can actually escalate problems to the point of no return.

With a lot of good help to be found out there, letting common issues a lot of couples face become bigger than need be is needless.  Being a family therapist San Diego has allowed me to see it first hand.

I have been able to witness how taking those issues head on before a problem begins can make resolving it much easier.  I have also seen how waiting to long or even not along, can turn a common problem into an issue that leads to divorce.

As previously noted, with marriage such as they are in importance, that is an outcome that doesn't have to be. 

So for those that have the desire to try to save the marriage, finding professional help like marriage counseling could be what saves the relationship.

If this is the position you find yourself in, why not try it out.  You have nothing to lose.

The Need for Marriage Therapy

July 10, 2009
Author: Matt

Marriage is often called the sacred union.As it should be.  After all, when a happy couple say "I do" they are agreeing to be with each other till death do them part.  Even through bad times, like sickness and poorer.

Notice I left out the health and richer part.  Because often times, those times are the easy.

But whatever the situation, if you are having marriage troubles, keeping the marriage healthy and happy does become a struggle.  It is during this time a family therapist San Diego might be the best option.

Because if the issues start to become a pattern, this will more often than not lead to divorce.  Problems such as fighting, not trusting, no intimacy, despising each other, etc.

When these things do start happening, the most important thing the couple should do is seek a marriage counselor.  why?Because to the couple it may not feel like it is, most marriage therapists will have seen it all.  And it is that experience they can draw upon to help the troubled marriage.

So why does it help to have marriage therapy or couples therapy?  Well I would like to share some insights from my experience as a San Diego marriage therapist.

Several factors beginning with safety.A good therapist is able to offer to the couple an environment they can feel safe in.  An environment that is not the norm where all the fights happen.

This prevents the usual angry or hysterical outbursts that occur in a familiar environment.

Second, as mentioned before, they have experience.This presents an opportunity for the therapist to share with the couple his experience of whether what they are going through is normal.

Third, they can help with communications.  Often times that is one of the contributing factors in troubled marriages.  When trouble happens, each person usually becomes defensive and the line of communication becomes difficult.The therapist will be helpful in opening those lines.

Fouth, the couples will be helped to better use problem solving skills.Obviously, there are issues.And the better equipped the married couple is, the more able they will be to solve their problems.

Finally, they can help the couple to understand the situation.They accomplish this by helping them listen better, share their feelings better, and then help them interpret it all.

As you can see, when the marriage is in trouble, the best way to save it is through therapy.If you do find your situation is similar to this, go seek some help.  Take it from my experience doing marriage counseling San Diego.

How Can Marriage Counseling Help

July 3, 2009
Author: Matt

In a perfect world, the couple would live happily ever after when they say "I do". Unfortunately, this is not a perfect world we live in. And most times, following the wedding day, that is when trouble begins.

Whatever the reason, all of a sudden it turns from a happy relationship to a cold and bitter relationship.

In this article, I am going to draw on my experience as a family counselor San Diego to help a couple decide, when is it time for a couple to seek marriage counseling.

Disagreements, arguments, and fights happen.  It is bound to happen in most marriages.  But there comes a time when a couple needs to decide if it is normal everyday life.Or if what is going on is not normal and time to seek help.

Because left unchecked, problems in marriages can lead to ugly divorces.

So for couples seeking to keep their marriage, here are some key signs to look for and decide if marriage counseling San Diego is needed.

The first sign is there constant bickering?Do small issues make you guys argue? Although seemingly insignificant, this could be the start of something that turns bigger.

Second, do you guys find it hard to say anything nice about each other? This shows you that you two are holding contempt for each other and that is not beneficial.

A third thing is do you find that your level of respect for each other is not there?  In every relationship, there has to be respect.

Fourth sign, is there a loss of intimacy with each other?  This is not just for sex, although this is part of it.Does is seem like the two of you aren't as close as you once were?

Fifth, are you happier when your spouse is not around?This sign is not good and the beginning of a break up.

Sixth, is there a loss of trust between one another? One of the most important things for a married couple is trust.  When you are going to live and share your most intimate moments there has to be trust.

Finally, has there been unfaithfulness between one of you?  This seems simple and obvious.Unfortunately, some of the times when this happens, some couples ignore it rather than try to face it.

Of course there a lot of other signs to look for.  But these are some big ones when deciding if it is time to seek a marriage counselor in San Diego. 

If these are some of the things you are experiencing, and to find a way to save your marriage is your goal.  You need to seek professional help to try and work out these problems.

A lot of times, a third viewpoint is very helpful for the situation, and this is why a family counselor can help.